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This is my first-ever blog post thingy and I was going to start it all off with an introduction to my whole site, views on tactical chastity, etc, but how dull would that be? Far more entertaining for all of YOU, I feel, to kick off with a really good row.

So, today an extract of my Not Tonight Mr Right book is published in the Sunday Times’ Style magazine. Yay! Then I saw that, at the end of the extract, a Kate Harper has written a first-person rebuttal, entitled “No sex? You’ve got to be kidding”. It could as well be titled “It’s my panty and I’ll drop it if I want to.”

It starts off in the way you’d expect…

“Jimi Hendrix asked, ‘Are you experienced?’ And yes, I am. Experience has taught me that sex feels good. Of course it can cause hurt…”

Sorry — eh? Does sex “feel good” or does it “cause hurt”? I would have thought that something that feels good doesn’t also cause hurt, but… Oh well, never mind, let’s go on.

“I’ve had sex when I wanted to my whole adult life…”

Good for you!

“…[sex] can also take you to some interesting places — and I’m not referring to up the aisle or down the mortgage lenders.”

Righto. What are you referring to then? Oh, here we are:

“…I have enjoyed exciting sex… followed by some philosophical pillow talk.”

Oh, a CHAT! I see! Casual sex — that may “feel good” or may “cause hurt” is worth the ups and downs because you get a lovely chat afterwards. Ms Harper, you’re a conundrum. A moment ago you were coming over all independentier-than-thou, refusing to marry or buy property with some bloke, but it turns out you love best the post-coital chatting. (Because, you see, if you don’t have sex, you also never speak to men. Staying up all night talking never happens unless you’re naked. It’s impossible to be philosophical in underwear.)

“Men and women together isn’t just about sex: it’s sexy.”

Oi, hands off MY point! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. You don’t have to shag them to enjoy their company. And if you do, then maybe they’re actually not that great a catch.

 ”Yes, there have been men I’ve liked the idea of settling down with. I have toyed with the air of artfully snaring them…”

Because doing what’s best for you (but which requires some form of self-discipline) isn’t being smart, it’s being “artful”

“…but in the end, I don’t have the manipulative desire to weave the sort of net required to catch them, or the urge to run my emotional life with the sort of strategic planning you find in large companies.”

Again, I love how she writes. But to me, a large company would be a successful company. This is in my book, actually. Women go into love with the idea that, “If it happens, it happens.” We NEVER do that with ANY other area of our life. Would you wait for the perfect job to land in your lap? Would you wait even for the perfect cup of coffee to land in your lap (unless you wanted a million-pound lawsuit against McDonalds)? No! So why refuse to apply even the most BASIC form of planning to your emotional life?

Grr! We are WOMEN. We have a limited amount of time in which to have children. Ms Harper’s final point, after she bangs on about it being a good thing that we can shag anyone we like (and some we don’t) without getting 40 lashes like we would in the Taliban — which is just laughable — is that:

 ”life’s awful short, guys”.

I would say, life’s too short girls. Life is far too short — especially if you want children — to waste years in dead-end relationships.